Breaking Point!

Counselling for Front line and Emergency Services. (August 2025)

Blue Light Special Offer: £40.00 per hour for the months of August, September and October.

I wasn’t always a therapeutic counsellor. I retired from front line policing after I experienced a physiological breakdown because of post-traumatic stress.

Front line or emergency services are often subjected to traumatic experiences that can seriously impact individuals’ mental and physical health. Even when they are observing or working with the trauma of others, they may experience vicarious trauma.

According to Avon and Somerset Police Federation (2025) a Police Suicide Prevention Campaign has been launched.  They state that ‘in 2023 alone, there were 7,055 deaths registered in the UK where the cause was recorded as suicide. This is the highest rate per size of population since 1999’.  ‘Although the causes of any suicide are complicated and nuanced,’ they say, ‘many (Police) officers are deeply affected when they attend incidents where a member of the public has taken their own life’.

Front line police deal with many incidents which most of the public will never be exposed to, including sudden deaths. Suicide can be particularly harrowing as officers will often be the first on the scene. They manage the scene often dealing with the most difficult circumstances that I will not detail here, then they take responsibility to personally deliver news of the death to the next of kin and attend the mortuary with the family members to make a formal identification of the body. (When possible).  

Psychological support in the Police service historically extended to a ‘debrief’ with the line manager. This support can be seen to be insufficient for many of the front-line incidents that Police attend and so too often those experiences are buried deep within the psyche. For some people, these experiences become numerous and then rather like a pressure cooker, at some point, the steam creeps out from under the lid. 

Avon and Somerset Police Federation campaign has called for ‘the practical step of mandatory TRiM (Trauma Risk Management) sessions for every police officer who attends a suicide’.  This would be a good step forward in every Police Force UK wide however there are numerous other situations that can cause vicarious trauma within the job and so it may be beneficial to offer these sessions to officers whenever they need it.

I recall being offered TRiM 6 months after I had dealt with a harrowing road traffic collision.  The colleague who led the meeting with me, was a volunteer TRiM practitioner and a police officer himself.  The first thing he said to me was ‘This is not counselling’. It is a debrief where officers may be signposted to other services if required.  Was that time frame too little too late? Some may believe so.

The DSM5 (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) is the most recent publication from the APA (American Psychiatric Association) published in 2013.  It is used to inform health professionals across the globe.

The DSM 5 states; ‘Common physical disorders and symptoms (of trauma) include somatic complaints; sleep disturbances; gastrointestinal, cardiovascular, neurological, musculoskeletal, respiratory, and dermatological disorders; urological problems; and substance use disorders.’ (APA,2013).  Emergency services are not exempt from these complaints. 

During my service, I experienced an unspoken ‘stiff upper lip attitude’ within the police. There is a cultural fear of accessing any mental health support through the occupational health department for fear of being forever branded ‘wibble’ and your reputation, (that my tutor stated, ‘precedes you,’) tarnished for the duration of your career.  

The dark humour and ‘just carry on’ attitude can cause shame in seeking help for mental health issues.  This in turn can escalate and end in tragedy.

According to the Sussex Police Federation (2025) ‘between 2011 and 2022, there were 242 suicides of current police officers and PCSOs in England and Wales. More recently – from 2021 to 2024 – an estimated 80 former and current police officers took their own lives’.  These individuals were predominantly male. There is likely a connection with societal gender norms in this statistic. House of Commons Library (2025) illustrate that it is 3 times as likely for males to carry out suicide in the UK than females. I will explore this divide in a future blog.

Government Technology (2025) state ‘nationally, 1,405 first responders were reported to have' carried out 'suicide since 2018.  In response, department heads are implementing mental health and wellness training for police, firefighters and EMTs’.

 Promoting wellbeing in our emergency services will hopefully start to rid the outdated ‘keep calm and carry on attitudes’. This de-stigmatization together with a more robust promotion of TRiM support and signposting to reputable counselling services (such can be found on 'Counselling Directory') might help individuals to seek help either privately or through their occupational health departments to support their mental health.

Take advantage of my current offer of 20% discount for all blue light services.

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My Story

According to the DSM5, ‘there is a significant connection between trauma, including adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), and chronic health conditions.’ (APA,2013)

I experienced many instances of vicarious trauma in my job as a Police Officer. In addition, I was holding childhood trauma that I had not yet dealt with.

 The DSM 5 states that the worst choice of vocation for those people with undealt with childhood trauma would be a Paramedic or a Police officer because of the high possibility of experiencing vicarious trauma.

There is no surprise then that I succumbed to my fate. I collapsed whilst on duty and never returned to the job I loved.

Since that time, I have been diagnosed with CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome). According to a recent nationwide research campaign by Decode ME, people with the condition have a gene that predisposes them to the condition. As it is generally understood that excess cortisol (excreted during times of prolonged stress) can be a contributory factor in autoimmune disease, it is entirely possible that my childhood and vicarious trauma contributed to this condition.

I also discovered that my collapses are due to a condition called 'Vaso Vagal Syncope'. The vagus nerve (in vaso vagal) is a key component of the parasympathetic nervous system with the job of controlling our heart rate, breathing and digestion.

  My ‘Vaso Vagal collapses’ are triggered by complex trauma. The part of the brain concerned with keeping us safe is called the amygdala. This part of the brain uses previous personal experiences as a reference and will alert our body when it senses danger. Our body responds in the most appropriate way either by preparing for ‘fight’, ‘flight’ or freeze.

 If we have experienced interpersonal trauma as a young child when the perpetrator was an adult, it is likely that our body will bypass ‘fight’ and ‘flight’ as back then, to try to fight or escape would likely have exposed us to more danger. This leaves the ‘freeze’ response as the only remaining option.

In people who have experienced numerous or significant traumatic events, the amygdala can become hypersensitive.  According to Carolyn Spring, it can ‘sound the fire alarm even when it’s just burnt toast’.

My hypersensitive amygdala senses mortal danger even when there is no danger and signals to my body to prepare not for fight/flight but ‘freeze’ which is the final line of defence in the hope to keep me alive when nothing else will work.  

Carolyn Spring explains that the human freeze response mimics that of an animal when it is being chased by a predator. If the animal realises that its prey is closing in, it can ‘play dead’, in the last effort to save its’ own skin.

 My freeze response looks like a ‘collapse’. My heart rate slows along with my blood pressure and my breathing becomes shallow and if I move at all I lose the contents of my stomach. The time of recovery is dependant on how safe my surroundings feel.

The DSM 5 sheds light on my collapses and states that those with PTSD can experience ‘marked physiological reactions to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event(s).’ This explains why I can experience a collapse without any conscious awareness of the perceived danger as my amygdala controls my bodily response. 

The DSM 5 states ‘Somatization indicates a focus on bodily symptoms or dysfunctions to express emotional distress. Somatic symptoms are more likely to occur with individuals who have traumatic stress reactions, including PTSD.’ (APA,2013). 

I retired from the Police Service without any medical pension as I was never diagnosed with suffering from Traumatic stress reactions or PTSD. I now understand that my illness was as a direct result of my vicarious trauma experiences and that my body responded with a traumatic stress reaction.

Every Cloud.

The good news is…that I have worked hard on my trauma for many years in personal counselling.  My extensive training has informed my understanding of my conditions and has taught me how to manage them to lead a fulfilling life.  Furthermore, I am healed to a sufficient degree to allow me to be emotionally available to my clients.  I hope to be able to offer others what I would have benefited from during those years serving our country.